The remarkable thing about Shakespeare is that he really is very good, in spite of all the people who say he is very good.
~ Robert Graves

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.
~ Douglas Adams

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.
~ Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

Today is the last day of some of your life.
~ Author Unknown

Without geography, you're nowhere.
~ Author Unknown

It's always darkest before the dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
~ Author Unknown

You can't have everything... where would you put it?
~ Steven Wright

He's turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he's miserable and depressed.
~ Harry Kalas, on Garry Maddox, 1981

He who believes that the past cannot be changed has not yet written his memoirs.
~ Torvald Gahlin