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• ._________.
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• ._I__I_,
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  ._I__I_,
  D0 I HAVE PERMISI0N TO MAKE AN EMERGENCY LANDIN IN UR BEDROOM 2NITE
  
• ( ' ) its ME! / /
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  (? UR ANGEL
  ; ) IN
  (? DISGUISE
  
• (?
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  (?
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  _; (
  ( )-
  (? -
  _; (
  (? -
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  (? I miss u Like Crazy
  
• (. .) 18 YEARS
  ).(
  ( * )
  ( o o ) 25Y
  ) . (
  ( * )
  ( O O ) 35 Y
  ) o (
  ( * )
  CHANGE WOMAN BEFORE LATE
  
• (((((( ))))))
  (((( ?) (? ))))
  (((((; <._.> ;)))))
  (((((( __, ))))))
  Dont u ever send me your picture again! u scared me to death!
  
• ()...()
  (o o)
  / ( ..)
  /\"
  "
• ) (
  (__I_)
  ) (
  (_I__)
  ) (
  (__I_)
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  (_I__)
  I JUST WIPED MY ASS ON YOUR SCREEN!
  
• ///////
  ( o o)
  --ooO-( )-Ooo--
  
• 
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• o,,,o /),/)
  ( ' ; ' ) ( ' ; ' )
  (,,)--(,,)(,,)--(,,)
  U'n me forever..
  and ever and ever!
  
• PRESENTING
  / /
  (.)(.)
  (.__.)
  FLICK
  ()---()
  I . _. I
  ( (o_, )
  POOH
  (o)(o)
  (.___.)
  KERMIT
  AND...
  ,,,
  ?(._.)?
  (---) YOU!!!
  
• q'''''''p H?y!
  ( ? )@ L?k?n
  o( )'/ 4 m??
  ? ''' ?
  I kn?w
  ? M?SS M?...
  B?t t?ll ? s?m?th?ng...
  ? m?ss ? m?re.
  
• She is Basanti
  @
  <@>
  JL
  @
  <@>
  JL
  @
  <@>
  JL
  @
  <@>
  JL
  @
  <@>
  JL
  @
  <@>
  JL
  she will Not dance.Coz Basanti kutto ke
  samne nahi nachti....
  
• Ajit: Kuch hee der mein hamara helicopter hindustan ki sarhadon ke pare door birmingham mein hoga. Wahaan tumhe ek kaale rang ki sioorlett (chevrolet) nazar aayegi. Wo tumhe signal degee?on..off..on..off
  Robert: Boss..hamara signal kya hoga ?
  Aj
• Ajit: Maikal, Is saale ke ek haath mein laal aur doosre haath mein hara rang laga do.
  Maikal: Lekin kyon baas?
  Ajit: Bewakoof, itnaa bhi nahin jaanta? Jab pulice yehaan aayegi to ise range haathon pakad legi.
  
• Ajit: Maikal, ise liquid helium mein daal ke 440 V pass kar do. Phir yeh superconductor ban jaayega, aur zindagi bhar ticket kaat-ta reh jaayega.
  
• Ajit: Maikal, woh jo admi ghadi pahne tumhe nazar aarahaa hai,
  woh hamara mehman hai. Tum ja kar uske doosre hath mein bhee gadhi pahna do,
  phir woh do ghadi ka mehman ho jayega!
  
• Ajit: Mona daarrling, tum Toni ke saath ghuumna band kar do, nahin to bahut Mona Toni ho jayegee...
  
• Ajit: Peter, time bomb le aao aur is kutte ko usse bandh do. Timer ko theek das baje set kar do. Nahin nahin, yeh saala to sub cheez hamesha late karta hai. Iski maut bhi late honi chahiye. Timer ko panch minute late rakh do. Arre, Robert, Robert, bevkoof
• Ajit: Raaberrt, Mona ke dono hathon ko kaat do.
  Robert: Magar kyoon baas ?
  Ajit: Typing to nahi atee, kamsekam shaarthand to seekh legi.
  
• Ajit: Rabert! isko eraser se maar do, yeh mar bhi jayega aur mit bhi jayega
  
• Ajit: Robert, ees aadmi ko maar Dalo aur ees ki laash ke saath aek kela (banana) aur thoda milk rakh do.
  Robert: vo kyon boss?
  Ajit: Aare bavekuf, jub police ko lash milegi to police samajegi ke koi cereal killer ne eeska khoon kiya hey.
  
• Ajit: Robert, Harshad Mehta the Bull ka stool test karaao
  Robert: Kyon boss?
  Ajit: Pata to chale akhir ye Bullshit kya hota hai
  
• Ajit: Robert, in kutton ke saamne yeh Compooter laga do aur debugger istarrt kar do.
  Robert: Lekin kyoon, baas?
  Ajit: Saale Checkpoint mein atak jayenge.
  
• Ajit: Robert, Ise varnish mein daal do, saala mar bhi jaayega aur finish bhi ho jaayega.
  
• Ajit: Robert, isey peekak paisan pila do, yeh more sey no-more ho jayegaa?
  
• Ajit: Robert, isey thodi shampane pila do, paheley shame sey, phir pain sey mar jayegaa?
  
• Ajit: Robert, Isss Haramzaade ko social security pe daal do.
  Saale ko Society jeene nahin degi aur security marne nahin degi.
  
• Ajit: Robert, Test Match mein kyaa ho raha hai ?
  Robert: Boss, Vivian Richards chhakke pe chhakke maar raha hai.
  Ajit: Saaleh ko sabak sikhana padega. Lunch break mein usse phone milana.
  Robert: Yes Boss.
  Ajit: (on phone, to Richards):
• Ajit: Robert, ye chef ne aachha khana banaya. Tum ees ke ghar jao aur ees ke ghar ki bell nikal do.
  Bell ki jagah tum peas rakh do
  Robert: vo kyon Boss?
  Ajit: Bevekuf, men ees ko no-bell pea sur prize dena chahta hun
  
• Bob: Boss, mission par kaise jaaoon, mujhe headek ho raha hai.
  AJIT: Abe head ek ho ya do, kaam to karna hi padega.!
  
• Maikal: Baaas, yeh aadmi to kuch bol hi nahin raha hai. Kya karen ?
  Ajit: Ise revaalving chair mein daal do. Pata chal jaayega chakkar kya hai.
  
• Peter: Boss? Sona kahan hai?
  Ajit: Tum chahe jahan bhi sona, lekin mujhe to Mona darling ke saath sona!
  
• Robert: Boss , Sona kahan hai ? ( Where is the Gold ? )
  Ajit: Kahin par bhi so jao Robert !!
  
• Robert: Boss ab kya hoga ??
  Ajit: Robert Ek aur hole bana do, aur ek hole me IN aur doosre me OUT likh do. Ek hole se paani ander aayega aur doosre se bahar chala jayega !!
  
• Robert: Boss, humne sidey ko pakad liya
  Ajit: Ise maar ke pulees station ke saamne rakh do. Aur iske badan par ek sui chubha do.
  Robert: Par sui kyon, baass!
  Ajit: Bewakoof! Pulees yeh samjhegi ki sui-cide hua hai!
  
• Robert: Boss, mere dono bachon ke liye koi naam bataiye..
  Ajit: Ek ka naam rakho Peter?.
  Robert: boss or doosre ka ?
  Ajit: Repeater.
  
• Robert: Boss, mere teen bacche hue. Unko kya naam doon?
  Ajit: Ek ka naam rakhna Peter, doosre ka Maikal, aur teesre ka Cha Ling Chu.
  Robert: Par Cha Ling Chu kyoon?
  Ajit: Bewakoof, duniya ka har teesra bacchaa Chinese hota hai!
  
• Robert: Boss! Aaap ko kaun si teen chiz sabse jahyahda pasand hein boss?
  Ajit: Ek Mona, Doosra Sona, aur Tisra, Mona ke saath Sona
  
• The two cricketers' wives were talking.
  'What does your husband do?' 'He's a cricketer.'
  'So's mine. Who does your play for?'
  'Well, I think it's the United Nations. He says he's always bowling Chinamen.'
  
• 'I can't understand it,' said the captain.
  It was such an important game that I bribed the umpire and yet we still lost.'
  'Terrible, isn't it,' a bowler agreed. 'It's getting so you can't trust anyone.'
  
• 'I'm proud to say that in thirty years of playing cricket,
  I've never scored less than twenty five runs and never taken
  less than three wickets,' said Santa.
  'I wish I could say that,' said Banta.
  Buta spoke up. 'Well, why don't you? S
• 'I'm very nervous about my first game for this team.' says a young cricketer.
  'Why?'
  'Well, they might all be great players.'
  'Don't worry. If they were any good, they wouldn't be playing with you!'
  
• 
  ""
• Although it isn't generally known, there was once an industrial
  dispute during a test match at the Eden Gardens.
  As a result of it, the Indian batsmen became
  the first ever union to come out on a non-strike.
  
• An American who knew nothing of the game had been taken
  to a few cricket matches by a friend and was now studying the end-of-season averages.
  Every now and then he came across an asterisk and the words:
  'Signifies not out.' Finally, he turn
• In a calmer moment, Bhola and his wife were sitting at home.
  Bhola was as usual reading some bowling averages.
  'Do you remember the day you proposed at the cricket match?'
  said she romantically. 'You were bold.'
  'No I wasn't,' muttered
• In a Ranji Trophy match, the batsman was out first ball.
  'Not like last week,' said the wicket-keeper.
  'No,' said the batsman.
  'Last week I stayed in and got forty and when I got back all the beer was gone!'
  
• India's one-time dashing batsman, Sehwag had a high opinion
  of himself and was very free with his advice to the captain, Dhoni.
  'You know,' he said, 'You've picked two men who should never be in the side.'
  'Oh really,' said the captain icil
• Mrs Jones : I'd like my son to be excused playing cricket.
  I don't think he should mix with that sort of person.
  Teacher: How d'you mean?
  Mrs Jones: Well; I distinctly heard him say that
  the man in the white coat was a vampire!
  
• Pyarelal had taken his reluctant wife to a cricket match.
  She sat through the first innings although plainly bored.
  In the second innings a batsman gave a tremendous swipe
  and knocked the ball out of the ground.
  'Thank goodness they go
• Q : Why Mhd.kaif wasn't get any chance eventhough having enough potential ?
  A : Because he is from Luck 'no'
  
• Q. What did 10dulkar say after the India-Australia match ?
  A. Shaken but not stirred ....
  Q. What did 10dulkar say after the India-Pakistan match ?
  A. Massacred but not killed....we're not worried.
  
• Q. What do you call an Indian Cricketer with 100 runs against his name?
  A. A bowler.
  
• Q. What does Agarkar put in his hands to make sure the next ball almost always takes a wicket?
  A. A bat.
  
• Q. What is the height of optimism?
  A. An English batsman putting on sunscreen.
  
• Q. What is the main function of the England coach?
  A. To transport the team from the hotel to the ground.
  
• Q. What would Glenn McGrath be if he was English?
  A. An all rounder.
  
• Q. What's the Indian version of a hat trick?
  A. Three runs in three balls.
  
• Q. What's the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Sehwag?
  A. The walk back to the pavilion.
  
• Q. Why are Indian batsmen looking forward to the new millennium?
  A. So they can at least say they passed a century.
  
• Q. Why don't English fielders need pre tour travel injections?
  A. Because they never catch anything.
  
• Q. Why is Darren Gough the unluckiest bowler on tour?
  A. Because he was born in England.
  
• Rahul 'The Wall' Dravid had been at the crease for two hours
  and had scored one run. Rival team players were getting impatient,
  and so was the non-striker batsman.
  It finally got too much for the umpire as well.
  He raised his finger an
• Sachin Wife: Go to market and buy some vegetables!
  Sachin: Condition is not i ll go after sometime.
  Sachin Wife: Dont worry wear my saree! No can identify you!
  But one lady identifies in the market and asked hai sachin how R U!
  Sachi
• Sachin's Son: Mom! look here dad hitting sixers all the way.
  Mom: Son! that is boost advertisement.
  
• Santa Singh was watching his first ever cricket match at Mohali,
  and enjoyed the first 6 balls off which Ganguly scores 10 runs.
  Suddenly Santa gets up and walks away.
  Why??
  Because he heard the Umpire call it 'OVER'
  
• Shoaib Akthar sent his thunderbolts whizzing past Ganguly
  and the wicket-keeper for boundary byes from every ball of his opening over. The captain Shoaib Malik said, 'I think I'll rest you for a while.'
  'You can't do that,' said Akthar. 'I've ju
• Sidhu during his school days..
  Teacher : Correct the sentence, 'A bull and a cow is grazing in the field'
  Young Sidhu : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
  Teacher : How ?
  Young Sidhu : Ladies first
  
• The batsman was out first ball.
  On the long walk back to the pavilion he had to pass the incoming batsman,
  a supercilious rival. 'Hard luck, old man,' smirked the newcomer.
  'Yes. It's a shame I had to be right in the middle of a hat trick <
• The cricket enthusiast would travel any distance to watch
  a match-nothing could keep him from the game he loved.
  One day, a friend met him and said, 'You're looking a bit down.'
  'The wife said she's s going to divorce me.'
  'What ground
• The cricketer was proud of his progress as a batsman and invited
  his mother-in-law along to watch him play, hoping to impress her.
  At the crease, he turned to the wicket-keeper and said 'I'm anxious
  to do well and really hit this ball. That
• The cricketer was visiting the psychiatrist.
  Cricketer: 'It's terrible. I can't score runs, I'm a terrible bowler,
  and I can't hold a catch. What can l do?
  Doctor: 'Get another job.'
  Cricketer: 'I can't. I'm playing for India tomorrow!
• The eager young batsman had just scored yet another duck
  and was apologising to the captain.
  'I think I could do with some advice.
  What sort of coach would you recommend?'
  'A long distance one.'
  
• The ever nervous Ganguly was having a terrible time facing Akthar
  and was lucky to still be at the crease.
  During a lull, he stammered to the wicket keeper,
  'Well, I expect you've seen worse players.'
  Silence....
  Ganguly repeats '
• The game was drifting off into total boredom,
  when a man in the crowd suddenly burst into a round of applause.
  The man next to him said 'Why did you do that?'
  'Sorry' he replied 'I was trying to keep myself awake!'
  
• The Indian captain, Dhoni was in despair at his side's fielding.
  Match after match, they dropped every chance that came their way.
  Finally one day the captain called his men together
  and told them that he was taking them fishing.
  What
• The two rival cricketers were talking.
  'The local team wants me to play for them very badly.'
  'Well, you're just the man for the job.'
  
• Two old cricketers were talking in the club.
  'What was your highest score?'
  'A hundred and ten not out.'
  'Mine was a hundred and twenty not out',
  and what was the most number of wickets you took?'.
  'Oh, no. This time it's your tu
• ( ' ) its ME! / /
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  ( ')
  / /
  ( ) /
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  ( )'
  (')
  ; )
  (')
  (? UR ANGEL
  ; ) IN
  (? DISGUISE
  
• 
  ""
• < ( . . )>
  / ( v)
  (,,)..(,,)...
  Hello, How R U?
  < ( . . )>
  / (v )
  ( , , )..( ,, )...
  FINE..!
  R U bored from MY SMS!
  < ( . . )> S o r r y
  / ( v )(,,) again!
  FINE..!
  
• 1+1=2 eyes look at u...
  12+12=24 hours thinking about u...
  3+4=7 days in week missing u...
  1+11=12 months I always need A SWEET PERSON like U.
  
• 24hrs make a lovely day,
  7 days make a lovely week,
  52 weeks make a lovely year & knowing a
  person like me will make ur life lovely.
  Have a lovely day n life!**
  
• A daily thought...
  A silent tear...
  A Constant wish that u r near...
  Words are few but thoughts r deep...
  Memories of our frenship i'll always keep!!
  
• A father asks peon: How are the studies in this college? Where do I see my son in future?
  Peon: The future is bright, I had also completed my engineering from the same college!
  
• A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share
  of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit.
  
• A happy New Year! Grant that I
  May bring no tear to any eye
  When this New Year in time shall end
  Let it be said I've played the friend,
  Have lived and loved and labored here,
  And made of it a happy year.
  
• A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.
  
• A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government.
  
• A Relaxed Mind, A Peaceful Soul,
  A Relaxed Mind, A Peaceful Soul,
  A Joyful Spirit, A Healthy Body &
  Heart full of Love..
  All these are my Prayers for You..
  Wish u a Happy New Year.
  
• A smile is the best lighting system of the face, the best cooling system of the head,
  and the best warming system of the heart. Keep smiling! =)
  
• A word to say, a word to hear
  Even in ur absence i feel u near
  R relation is strong..hope it goes long
  v wil remain d same til d life goes on!
  
• Aa gale lag ja mere yaar,
  Dedoon Jadu Ki jhappi do char,
  Aaise hi katjaye Zindegi without any risk
  Es ummid ke sath Wish You a ......
  Very HAPPY NEW YEAR 2008!
  
• All I wanted was sum1 2 care 4 me
  All I wanted was sum1 who'd b there 4 me
  All I ever wanted was sum1 who'd b true
  All I ever wantedwas sum1 like U...
  
• Always be Happy, always wear a smile;
  Not because life is full of reasons to smile but because
  ur smile itself is a reason for many others to smile...
  
• Among politicians the esteem of religion is profitable;
  the principles of it are troublesome.
  
• As days go by, my feelings get stronger,
  To be in ur arms, I can't wait any longer.
  Look into my eyes & u'll see that it's true,
  Day & Night my thought r of U..
  
• Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbours
  and let each new year find you a better man.